Turning a hot temper into cool action

(At least dogs can take their playful aggression out on us humans. The rest of us try to maintain our composure - well, most of the time I guess.)


The earliest memory I have of completely losing my temper was when I was 10 years old. Sure, I got angry lots of times as a kid; after all, I had a younger sister who was a tattletale and a show-off. Plus, I knew that mom loved her best.

I got a glimpse of how hot my temper could get when some school kid punched my little sister in the stomach and made her cry. I lost control and ran after the offender with my lunch pail raised above my head. I was a very good runner, yet I could see I wasn’t going to catch this girl so I threw the pail and missed the moving target.

I cried in anger and humiliation, found my sister and headed toward home. We never told mom what had happened; it was one of many secrets we kept over the years.

There’s not much that makes me angrier than bullies picking on the weak, those in power lording it over others, or other similar examples. Problem is, I tend to take up someone’s cause, they welcome the help, then long after they’ve given up and gone about their business, I’m still fighting away. It’s one of a few faults I’m working on.

I remember another time I lost it. We were living in Arizona and I worked for a gas company. Customer service was a fun place with wonderful co-workers. Our bosses were terrific too, and the pay and benefits were the best I’d ever had.

My duties included working with customers on payment arrangements, scheduling turn-ons and turn-offs, sending technicians out on gas leaks, that sort of thing. The first day on the job went swimmingly until late afternoon.

An experienced rep worked with me that memorable day and I have to say that the training I had up to that point did not prepare me for an out-of-control, irate councilman.

I answered the phone politely, gave my name and the next thing I knew the rep and I were blasted into outer space with the expletives and demands coming from the mouth of our city’s government official. He was one angry dude.

Seems like the guy was getting ready to attend a fancy-schmancy affair and, as he put it, just as he was putting on his tuxedo jacket he heard a loud protest from his children that their outdoor pool water was cold. Apparently, some stupid schmo from our company had turned off his gas.

Once I got over the shock, I looked up the guy’s account and found that he hadn’t paid his bill in over three months, hence the wrench upon the gas meter. We were instructed to send someone out immediately to remedy the situation, and no, he wasn’t planning on paying up until he had the time. He was, after all, a very busy man.

I was giggling inside somewhere because I just knew this guy wasn’t going to get his way. Boy, talk about being naïve. A technician was dispatched pronto, apologies were made, and an extension was given, along with a note on the customer’s account that pretty much guaranteed that this awful misdeed would never be repeated. It was explained to me that sometimes a utility must appear before the city council, and to put it succinctly, the two sides needed each other.

The respect I had for those in charge nearly evaporated, but something else took its place. I promised myself then and there that once I knew how to do my job well, I would help those who, in my opinion, really deserved it. It was inevitable that I would get fooled a time or two, but I learned and the system worked well for a few years.

I never got tired of helping those who were struggling from paycheck to paycheck, who would have no hot water or heat (yes, it does get cold in the desert during the winter) unless they were given just a few more days to make their payment. The relief in their voices often made my day.

I still love to help those who are having a hard time, whether that involves speaking up for them or doing something more. I can’t chase folks and throw things at them these days, but my time is never wasted when people get the help they need.

Life will never be fair, and we’ll have to accept that. Still, let’s keep looking for ways to even things up a bit. It’ll be fun, trust me on this.